anxiety

The Truth About Being Alone

Introverts Need Their Alone Time

Introvert- a person predominantly concerned with their own thoughts and feelings rather than with external feelings.

First let me say, I am rarely ever alone. But that’s sort of how my life is set up, with kids, family and work all taking a piece of me. Ryan and I are both introverts and have to make a conscious effort to fit in time for us to be alone. We try to find time alone together as a couple, and also fit in time by ourselves. But it’s always a struggle, life continues to find a way to mess up our plans. Lol

If your part of a big family, living in a dorm, in a socially demanding job, or whatever your situation might be, finding time alone can be really challenging, misunderstood and leave you feeling guilty. But trust me, being alone is not a bad thing, in fact I’d say it is highly underrated.

4390FA4B-101D-4DBC-BBB6-637A5B1B5FEA

Introverts Are Misunderstood 

The idea of being alone has such a negative stigmatism in our society that it’s meant to be avoided all together. If your an introvert amongst a world of extroverts you know what I am talking about.

People have misunderstood my less than sociable persona as being snooty many times. I’ve had friends admit they thought I didn’t like them at first, just because I wasn’t as sociable as they would have expected. This is a common misconception among the introverts I’ve known, and it feels as if introversion is looked at as a character flaw instead of a preference.

If your like me you’ve been pressured into social situations, that we’re not your cup of tea. And when you have chosen alone time your often left feeling guilty, or somewhat of a misfit for not participating. I’ve even experienced these awkward situations when going through my own grieving process.

Their intent is well placed, it just isnt always helpful, and extroverts especially have a hard time understanding us. These are some of the situations I’m talking about..

  • Family get-togethers
  • Dinner parties
  • holiday parties
  • sporting events and watch parties
  • school/work related events
  • Certain dating situations, meeting your significant other’s friends
  • loss(death, illness, break-ups)

I remember in one of my psychology classes first learning that I was an introvert. Our instructor asked the class a simple question. If you went out to a party with friends, socialized all evening, when you got home would you feel energized and pumped over the evening? Or would you feel emotionally exhausted, even if you had a good time. 

That’s when I knew…I could have a great time at that party, and be completely happy that I went. But I would be completely spent once I got home. This is when I started to embrace my introverted and somewhat nerdy ways.

68E947EB-BF64-49ED-BC0C-A12E14D8F909

Benefits of Alone Time

I think a fair amount of time spent alone is incredibly healthy, whether your in a relationship or not, whether your an introvert or not and whether your happy or not. Here are some of the benefits of seeking out that time by yourself.

  • When Ryan and I get our time away from each other, to focus on ourselves we always feel recharged and more available for each other.
  • When I have a lot on my mind, this always helps me bring life into focus. I can sort through all the noise in my head and get to a meaningful decision.
  • My most creative moments are times when I am alone.
  • Time alone to read is simply invaluable📚
  • There is a lot of noise in the world and sometimes it’s good to embrace the quiet. And just be yourself. 🤫
  • Grieving, sometimes we need that alone time to process everything in our own way.

3CD5F279-0DCD-460C-9295-8A304F528A02

How To Make Time To Be Alone

  • Self Acceptance is really key, there’s nothing wrong with you for preferring less social situations than some of your friends, coworkers and family.
  • Have you ever taken a Myers-Briggs Personality Test? Take it online with a friend, so you can both understand eachother’s needs and preferences better(I’m an ISFJ). I think it’s pretty fascinating! (But I’m also pretty nerdy).🤓
  • Reassure the people around you that this makes you happy and that your ok, nothing is wrong.
  • Don’t overcommit. (I am super guilty of doing just this). When I don’t make myself a priority everyone suffers.

I love being an introvert, and I wouldn’t change that for anything. What a bummer life would be if I didn’t like being with myself!🤣 lol

I hope these ideas and tips have been helpful… Rock On introverts!✌🏻

Thanks for reading our post and showing an interest in our family blog!

#colecampfireblog, #mentalhealth, #introverts, #Alonetime,

 

 

16 replies »

  1. I really enjoyed this.. My husband and I are always trying to find time alone.. Even though our kids are older and 2 are out of the house.. We eventually find time for ourselves… As for me , I crave time alone.. It’s been awhile since I’ve had ” just me time “… But the little I do have.. I cherish.. Loved yoye post….

    • Thank you so much! 💕I really appreciate you taking the time to read it and share a comment. 🙏
      Kids definitely make it more of a challenge to find time alone, don’t they…?🤪

  2. Excellent explanation. Thanks for that.
    would you feel emotionally exhausted, even if you had a good time…. That’s definitely me! 🙂

  3. I love my alone time. You described being an introvert perfectly. Your mention of being happy with going to a social situation but feeling exhausted after is all to relatable – been there many times!

  4. I’m an introvert too. I always thought I was an extrovert, but that came from liquid courage-wine. It’s when I stopped drinking that I realized I was actually pretty introverted.

  5. I think a lot of bloggers are introverts. It’s a great way to socialize without talking. I’m an ISTJ, so pretty close. I grew up in a house of introverts and now live with a family full of extroverts. It can be problematic at times. My husband is the extreme extrovert and has a desire to talk to everyone at a party. I prefer hanging around one or two close friends. I can never get him to leave either. I am used to that by now, but at first felt like I was being ignored. It is so different living in a house of introverts vs extroverts. Great post!

    • Thank you! That sounds a lot like my parents. My dad is always talking with everyone and my mom and I are the Introverts.
      Ya, we are pretty close. I’m the same way with one or two friends. I would probably be better with my finances if I was more of a thinker than a feeler. Haha Have a great Friday!😊

Leave a Reply